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Fudging skills on a résumé is always a bad idea. Feigning sports knowledge, on the other hand, is a perfectly acceptable way to get a leg up, whether in the office or at the dinner table with an intimidating father-in-law. Here are some choice sound bites to help you sound like a seasoned hockey or cricket pro (even if you know next to nothing about either one.)

Hockey

Faking knowledge about hockey might seem like a difficult task, but it’s doable if you follow a few easy steps:

1. Ask, “Did you hear Grapes’ rant last night?” This suggests that you watched hockey commentator Don Cherry; using his nickname “Grapes” shows you have some insider knowledge. Don’t worry about using the word “rant” – Grapes’ commentaries are always rants. That’s his style. You could also mention his outrageous outfit – that’s another sure bet.

2. Start a conversation with, “Can you believe the night Sid the Kid had?” (Just be sure that the Pittsburgh Penguins played before asking.) Sid the Kid refers to hockey great Sidney Crosby, and he’s a great conversation starter because his game playing is almost always memorable.

3. Another sure bet when talking about individual players’ nights is to say, “Another solid night for JT!” There is a pair of stellar point-getters who each go by “JT” – John Tavares and Jonathan Toews – so you can hardly go wrong here.

4. Where he plays next year is still up in the air, but saying “classic Bobby Lou” will make you sound like a huge NHL fan. Bobby Lou refers to goaltender Roberto Luongo. Whether it be for a good or bad night, Luongo is often a topic of conversation.

5. Say, “I couldn’t believe the refereeing in [insert game here].” Mention any game you like, because every night of NHL hockey guarantees a fan base – or two or three – will be angry about refereeing.

6. Live-stream the rest of the playoffs on your mobile device using the Rogers Anyplace TVTM app! This app will let you catch the 2013 hockey playoffs on CBC’s Hockey Night in Canada. Click here for more info.

Cricket

Pretending to know about cricket is a much more difficult task. Your best bet is probably to name-drop. Start with the big names in batsmen – chief among them is Chris Gayle, who smashed several records in 2013 and is making a case to be one of the best batsmen of all time. Other top offensive players include Hashim Amla and AB de Villiers of South Africa, Kumar Sangakkara of Sri Lanka as well as young Brit phenom Alastair Cook.

Just as important to cricket as good batsmen are good bowlers, the name given to what in baseball one would call a pitcher. Firmly atop the list of bowlers is South Africa’s Dale Steyn, who is a fast bowler with great control. Other big names to know are Saeed Ajmal of Pakistan, who is a right-arm off-spin bowler, and the always-animated H.K. Herath, a left-arm spinner from Sri Lanka.

Or, you could go beyond name-dropping and watch a couple of matches! Tune in June 6-23 for one of the cricket world’s most important tournaments.

Watch in high-definition on your TV, every match is scheduled to be shown live on Sportsnet World™*. Or, live stream the matches online via PCs at RogersAnyplaceTV.com/sports (you’ll need a subscription to SN-World). Click here for more info.

So whether you are approached by a fan of Canada’s favourite pastime or one of the world’s most popular sports, don’t worry. Stay on your toes and throw out some of the above topics of conversation and hope the horn blows to end the period quickly.

*Programming is subject to change at any time without notice.


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